Thinking about Passive and Causative

Japanese
#1

Sup yall, been wondering about this recently and decided its my very method of thinking thats making this hard for me to fully and properly understand and so im curious how people think when they approach Pass and Caus.

In theory, obviously I understand it. When I read it, I mostly understand it (although I still struggle with the concept of passive when it comes to inanimate objects) which may be an issue onto itself.
From a few of my more much more advanced friends they say it took them a while to fully comprehend how and when to use, and going into N3 I want to have a solid foundation of understanding since it seems like a common thing.

I live alone and am a teacher. No one really makes me do anything, nor do I really order people around either so, to me, the concept of being forced to do things just doesnt exist. Is there another way of thinking about these concepts im just missing somehow in terms of nuance to better get a grasp of whats happening?

#2

Does your boss never make you do anything?
Or did your parents ever make you do anything as a child?
Have you ever been voluntold to do something?

not to be like #weliveinasociety, but even if you live alone there should be situations where the causative apply!

also, its not just forced, but allowed

i.e. my boss allowed me to take leave on my birthday
This sentence would also be in the causative form.
社長が私を誕生日に休ませてくれました。

I guess it could be described as a situation where someone imposes their will/decision on you. When someone gives you permission, its because of their will/decision, so thats how I conceptualise it anyway. It can be thought of as “make” if you dont necessarily want to do it or dont have agency, and “allow” if you do want to do it. That’s a simplification but it works well enough for me.

It’s also key in polite language. ~~ させていただけませんか？(May I be permitted to ~~?) is the form you use when asking for permission to be allowed to do something.

It can also be used for situations where ones will is imposed but not necessarily in a bad way. 飲ませる, to make someone drink, is often used for babies or animals who basically can’t impose their own will. It can also be used to describe forcibly making someone drink alcohol, tho, lol.

#3

Do you know an easy way to remember the particles used in sentences that use causative because I keep using the wrong ones and making sentences that mean the opposite of what i want them to mean.